There is always that period of time after working full tilt which I will have been waiting for, and hoping for. When all the work has been done, bisque fired and glazed, and the kiln has been filled for that second and last firing, where I suddenly find myself lost. I want to have time off, and to start thinking of new projects, but my body and my mind is still so used to the work that I do not know what to do with myself. I have always wanted to be hardworking, and now that I am closer to this ideal, I still have the couch potato voice in my mind reminding me of all the time I have wasted in front of the telly. I know there is much talk about self care, and taking time away from stress, but what if that self-care is more about feeling good about yourself in terms of having worked to a degree which you can feel pride in?
I am starting a new job tomorrow, after stopping my evening job a few weeks ago. I have in these last few years, during the time both my children had not started at school yet, worked two jobs, while starting up my ceramics business. I shall miss this period in my life because it carried with it strange hours and flexibility, and small demanding people that I was able to wrap my time around, but also because, there was, in fitting everything together, (probably more like a Frankenstein Monster, than a beautiful patchwork quilt), a stressful excitement.